Mario Kart

There are always those days. Days when you just happen to fall out of bed and into your life, dragging your mug of coffee behind you.
My life – like Mario Kart – is spent driving around in an poorly designed vehicle that I can barely control, trying to manoeuvre between walls, ceilings and floors, dodging people, staplers and those funny little turtle shells that knock the living daylights out of you.
And every now and then you run headlong into a massive golden coin, and then you think “I totally get this game.” But you don’t. Not really.
And then you wonder if you’ll ever manage to gather your wits about you for the seconds it takes you to fully comprehend the mini-map as the world spins around you, lights and whistles blaring.
And then maybe you pause, momentarily stunned, only to have your team mate collide into your back with a satisfying crash as they curse you for your trouble.
But the game doesn’t end here. Your car is still intact; the shiny red paint is still as spotless as ever. And as your partners tail lights disappear in the distance, you decide to move (before anything else hits you). So you head off too, speeding as you try to make up for lost time, only to then realize that you’re moving against traffic.
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